As many clips as I look at on Youtube and as hard as I try to remember, I still have no idea why Load and Hex were dressed up as firefighters.
Anyway, I've decided that I'm making my plans too complicated. I need to get back to my roots.
Step one is simple: steal a space shuttle.
I'll show those jerks that I deserve a place in the next awards show. Muhaha.
Project Infamy is a go.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Aftermath
I'm not entirely sure how much we drank during the Decade's Finest, but when I woke up, I was on the couch with Deirdre sleeping on my chest like a cat, Lock was passed out with a bottle of wine in the destroyed remains of Deirdre's old crib, Load and Hex were in Hex and I's bed, both dressed like firefighters, Jack Knife was passed out with his head resting on the toilet seat, handcuffed to Red Water, who had passed out in the bathtub (which was also half-filled with gin), and Mechanor was in the kitchen making cinnamon rolls for everyone.
I honestly didn't remember the ceremony or our party until I watched it on youtube.
And by "it", I should mean, "them", because both our party and the ceremony had been uploaded, presumably by Kushiel on Lock and Load's orders.
I can't believe Quizzer won an award and I wasn't even nominated. Oh well, at least I got most of my villain predictions right. It makes sense that Death's Head won over Eliza, but I honestly don't envy the judge that made that decision.
I honestly didn't remember the ceremony or our party until I watched it on youtube.
And by "it", I should mean, "them", because both our party and the ceremony had been uploaded, presumably by Kushiel on Lock and Load's orders.
I can't believe Quizzer won an award and I wasn't even nominated. Oh well, at least I got most of my villain predictions right. It makes sense that Death's Head won over Eliza, but I honestly don't envy the judge that made that decision.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Thursday, March 31, 2011
STILL A Little Perturbed
Just a little.
Okay, well, maybe it's because there aren't a whole lot of categories for villains. I mean, it's not like any of Quizzer's other enemies got into the list. I mean, I'm not exactly a new villain. I was Bulldozer for years before following in the Doc's footprints.
If there was a Best Legacy Villain category, I'd be a shoe-in for that. They couldn't not nominate me for that.
But still...if Quizzer's in the running, I should be in there, somewhere. I'm his nemesis for crying out loud!
Feh. Screw it. I'm going to go attack the city with a giant robot manticore.
Welcome back from Spring Break, Quizzer. Hope you don't have to get up early for school tomorrow. Mwahaha.
Okay, well, maybe it's because there aren't a whole lot of categories for villains. I mean, it's not like any of Quizzer's other enemies got into the list. I mean, I'm not exactly a new villain. I was Bulldozer for years before following in the Doc's footprints.
If there was a Best Legacy Villain category, I'd be a shoe-in for that. They couldn't not nominate me for that.
But still...if Quizzer's in the running, I should be in there, somewhere. I'm his nemesis for crying out loud!
Feh. Screw it. I'm going to go attack the city with a giant robot manticore.
Welcome back from Spring Break, Quizzer. Hope you don't have to get up early for school tomorrow. Mwahaha.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Ug
So, I'm finished.
Yes, I know that I've been away a while, but I had a reason this time--I've been in Japan.
You know, I didn't realize, given some of my gadgets and previous plans, how bad that last sentence sounds until I typed it out. No, I didn't cause the earthquake, I was actually helping rebuild.
Normally I just would have donated, but O.G.R.E put out an all-points bulletin to villains around the globe for aid, and, well, it always pays to help out a big villain organization in need. I mean, O.G.R.E. has its fingers in a lot of pies.
Wow, I almost sound like a legitimate villain.
And,yes, before anyone asks, I am just slightly bitter about not getting nominated for anything at the Decade's Finest. I mean, okay, there are only two categories, I wasn't expecting to win, but if my freaking nemesis gets nominated, I should be on there somewhere, you know?
Bah, enough sulking. I have a date with New Vineyard and a giant robot...of some sort to plan. I mean, I have the giant robot parts just lying around, got to do something with them.
Should probably get it done before the ceremony in a week, though. Otheriwse it'd be like a bank heist during the Super Bowl--very successful but also somewhat unsatisfying since no one's around to menace.
Yes, I know that I've been away a while, but I had a reason this time--I've been in Japan.
You know, I didn't realize, given some of my gadgets and previous plans, how bad that last sentence sounds until I typed it out. No, I didn't cause the earthquake, I was actually helping rebuild.
Normally I just would have donated, but O.G.R.E put out an all-points bulletin to villains around the globe for aid, and, well, it always pays to help out a big villain organization in need. I mean, O.G.R.E. has its fingers in a lot of pies.
Wow, I almost sound like a legitimate villain.
And,yes, before anyone asks, I am just slightly bitter about not getting nominated for anything at the Decade's Finest. I mean, okay, there are only two categories, I wasn't expecting to win, but if my freaking nemesis gets nominated, I should be on there somewhere, you know?
Bah, enough sulking. I have a date with New Vineyard and a giant robot...of some sort to plan. I mean, I have the giant robot parts just lying around, got to do something with them.
Should probably get it done before the ceremony in a week, though. Otheriwse it'd be like a bank heist during the Super Bowl--very successful but also somewhat unsatisfying since no one's around to menace.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Almost Finished
So, while Quizzer has been trying to keep Wailing Kate from stealing that Shakespeare exhibit, I've been re-building my lair from the ground up, this time nestled in the base of the New Vineyard's artificial island. Just another week or so and I'll be up and running again.
I managed to scavenge a lot of parts from the robot lion when I went back to pick up what I could from the base. Not sure what to do with it, though, because that thing spectacularly failed twice, but it's got to have some use.
Is anybody else as excited as I am for the Decade's Finest award ceremony? I mean, this is the first big superbeing award ceremony they've had since the Supey's was vaporized from orbit by that Devias robot clone.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not expecting to get an award or anything--there are only like three villain awards and I'm pretty sure the only reason they're there is to discourage orbital deathrays, but, still...it'd be kinda cool if I did somehow win.
My bet, though, is that Worst Villain will be Rakshasa, Worst New Villain will be Cyanide, and Worst Evil Plan will go to the Rakshasa's convoluted President plan. There's some talk that Rakshasa'll be disallowed, though, in which case Worst Villain would be my sister, and Worst Evil Plan would be when Tallow was revealed to have replaced, like a quarter of every legislative branch in Europe and North America with wax clones.
I managed to scavenge a lot of parts from the robot lion when I went back to pick up what I could from the base. Not sure what to do with it, though, because that thing spectacularly failed twice, but it's got to have some use.
Is anybody else as excited as I am for the Decade's Finest award ceremony? I mean, this is the first big superbeing award ceremony they've had since the Supey's was vaporized from orbit by that Devias robot clone.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not expecting to get an award or anything--there are only like three villain awards and I'm pretty sure the only reason they're there is to discourage orbital deathrays, but, still...it'd be kinda cool if I did somehow win.
My bet, though, is that Worst Villain will be Rakshasa, Worst New Villain will be Cyanide, and Worst Evil Plan will go to the Rakshasa's convoluted President plan. There's some talk that Rakshasa'll be disallowed, though, in which case Worst Villain would be my sister, and Worst Evil Plan would be when Tallow was revealed to have replaced, like a quarter of every legislative branch in Europe and North America with wax clones.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Working Hard
Making a new base is harder than I remember it being.
Still, it's going well. As cool as the old base was, I'm loving how this is turning out. The old place had some problems, what with being originally designed to be a temporary workstation.
Also, I'll be able to get internet too, which is awesome.
Today, however, I mostly rested, watched tv, and played Hypno Bubble. I'm going to need the rest, too, because tomorrow I start Deirdre-proofing the place. That's going to be a bitch. It's bad enough my lair has to be toddler-proofed, but this kid is part god. You'd think that'd make it easier, but trying to prevent a kid from choking on small objects is pretty hard when she can crush larger objects into asphyxiation-sized chunks with her bare hands.
In other news, Judy keeps trying to contact me. She still says she had our kid, presumably cloned by mixing my cells and her cells. Though, I know I came to this conclusion myself, but the more I think about it the more it bothers me. Judy's a physicist and an engineer. As far as I know, she's got no experience with cloning tech. But I've seen pictures and, well, there's family resemblance, iincluding the telltale flame red hair. I'm not sure what to do. If I ignore the kid...even though I didn't have any part in making her, does that make me a deadbeat?
Also, my god Sinapse is annoying. I mean, I thought that vampire, Sanguinous, was the most annoying of Quizzer's enemies but, nope. It's like he read a book on how to be the most stereotypical megalomaniac he can be. He's treacherous, he's conceited, he's greedy, and, worst of all, his goal is to, of course, take over the world.
Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with villains that want to conquer to the world, but it's just not a realistic goal. Not for one person, not even for one country. When you get right down to it, the planet's too big and it has too many people on it.
Also, I've always thought telepathy/mind control was a creepy power, especially in the hands of a villain. I mean...think about it.
Oh well, now I'm ranting. Back to hypno-bubble.
Still, it's going well. As cool as the old base was, I'm loving how this is turning out. The old place had some problems, what with being originally designed to be a temporary workstation.
Also, I'll be able to get internet too, which is awesome.
Today, however, I mostly rested, watched tv, and played Hypno Bubble. I'm going to need the rest, too, because tomorrow I start Deirdre-proofing the place. That's going to be a bitch. It's bad enough my lair has to be toddler-proofed, but this kid is part god. You'd think that'd make it easier, but trying to prevent a kid from choking on small objects is pretty hard when she can crush larger objects into asphyxiation-sized chunks with her bare hands.
In other news, Judy keeps trying to contact me. She still says she had our kid, presumably cloned by mixing my cells and her cells. Though, I know I came to this conclusion myself, but the more I think about it the more it bothers me. Judy's a physicist and an engineer. As far as I know, she's got no experience with cloning tech. But I've seen pictures and, well, there's family resemblance, iincluding the telltale flame red hair. I'm not sure what to do. If I ignore the kid...even though I didn't have any part in making her, does that make me a deadbeat?
Also, my god Sinapse is annoying. I mean, I thought that vampire, Sanguinous, was the most annoying of Quizzer's enemies but, nope. It's like he read a book on how to be the most stereotypical megalomaniac he can be. He's treacherous, he's conceited, he's greedy, and, worst of all, his goal is to, of course, take over the world.
Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with villains that want to conquer to the world, but it's just not a realistic goal. Not for one person, not even for one country. When you get right down to it, the planet's too big and it has too many people on it.
Also, I've always thought telepathy/mind control was a creepy power, especially in the hands of a villain. I mean...think about it.
Oh well, now I'm ranting. Back to hypno-bubble.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
My Lair
My lair was, until recently, an old abandoned lake floor building that had been originally made to house workers while Brannigan was building the island that New Vineyard rests on. It had a lot of space, and several built-in workshops.
I'll miss it.
See, when I said "Quizzer would have to break into my base to beat the magnet plan I am awsome mwahahaha", I didn't realize he'd actually, you know, do it. But, yes, he broke into my lair, fought Hex and I, and I accidentally ended up trashing the place while trying to shoot him. Hex, Deirdre, and I managed to get into my mole machine, where we are now.
Luckily, I still have wifi in this bad boy.
I've managed to scavenge some of my stuff from the ruins, but I won't be able to go back there, since Quizzer and the authorities all know where it was.
Maybe I'll burrow into the island itself and set up shop in a manufactured cave or something.
This sucks but, hey, sometimes change is good.
Then again, all of the plunder I'd gotten from this and other capers is now gone, and I only have a fraction of my previous tech.
Stupid Quizzer.
I'll miss it.
See, when I said "Quizzer would have to break into my base to beat the magnet plan I am awsome mwahahaha", I didn't realize he'd actually, you know, do it. But, yes, he broke into my lair, fought Hex and I, and I accidentally ended up trashing the place while trying to shoot him. Hex, Deirdre, and I managed to get into my mole machine, where we are now.
Luckily, I still have wifi in this bad boy.
I've managed to scavenge some of my stuff from the ruins, but I won't be able to go back there, since Quizzer and the authorities all know where it was.
Maybe I'll burrow into the island itself and set up shop in a manufactured cave or something.
This sucks but, hey, sometimes change is good.
Then again, all of the plunder I'd gotten from this and other capers is now gone, and I only have a fraction of my previous tech.
Stupid Quizzer.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Friday, January 28, 2011
Update!
This plan is awesome.
Basically, it's a standard "ransom city for precious metals and gems" plan. Why always precious metals and gems? Mostly to make more things with.
But thousands of tiny magnet bombs, scattered everywhere, ready to cause havoc at a moment's notice? If Quizzer tries to stop them at one side of the city, I can set them off on the other side. He tries to save Downtown, I can detonate bombs in the Slags. He tries to save the Slags and I can detonate bombs in Southeast.
And the beautiful chaos they cause when they go off. I honestly can't see him foiling this one. At least not until I get a good haul.
He might just come right at me, though. I don't think he knows exactly where my base is, but I'm pretty sure he knows it's under water. Oh well, I've had years to get this thing Quizzer-proof. Let 'im come.
In more serious news, Rodney Richards, also known as the villain Lightning Rod, received the death penalty today, ironically enough by electric chair.
I'd say I feel bad about this, and how it sucks to have another dead villain, but he was scum, so screw him. People like him give other villains a bad name--even Captain Visigoth and "Lord" Grim're classier than he was.
I'd worry about getting flamed by his friends and henchmen, but I think he lost all of them a while ago.
Anyway, back to monitoring my plan.
Basically, it's a standard "ransom city for precious metals and gems" plan. Why always precious metals and gems? Mostly to make more things with.
But thousands of tiny magnet bombs, scattered everywhere, ready to cause havoc at a moment's notice? If Quizzer tries to stop them at one side of the city, I can set them off on the other side. He tries to save Downtown, I can detonate bombs in the Slags. He tries to save the Slags and I can detonate bombs in Southeast.
And the beautiful chaos they cause when they go off. I honestly can't see him foiling this one. At least not until I get a good haul.
He might just come right at me, though. I don't think he knows exactly where my base is, but I'm pretty sure he knows it's under water. Oh well, I've had years to get this thing Quizzer-proof. Let 'im come.
In more serious news, Rodney Richards, also known as the villain Lightning Rod, received the death penalty today, ironically enough by electric chair.
I'd say I feel bad about this, and how it sucks to have another dead villain, but he was scum, so screw him. People like him give other villains a bad name--even Captain Visigoth and "Lord" Grim're classier than he was.
I'd worry about getting flamed by his friends and henchmen, but I think he lost all of them a while ago.
Anyway, back to monitoring my plan.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Insert Maniacal Laughter
So, I spent today filling the city with Magnet Bombs on a remote timer. Made sure to put the "negatives" pretty close to the "positives".
Mwaha.
Hell yes magnet bombs.
Mwaha.
Hell yes magnet bombs.
Time to Turn Things Around
This year is the turning point. I'm going to write more, and I'm going to do more stuff. Like villain stuff.
Villain stuff. It's phrases like that that prove I'm a professional.
Why this sudden exclamation? Life's pretty good right now, honestly. Sure, my godly infant has become a godly toddler, but seeing her still makes me smile. Hex is still awesome to date and it's going really well. I haven't had any major schemes in a while, but I'm going to change that. Can't have Scarab and Sinapse muscling me out of my position as New Vineyard's main villain, after all.
I know just the thing to get me started off. An oldy but a goody, you might say. If you were, you know, incredibly lame.
Time to take the city by storm. Not literally, though. No more weather control for me. At least not right now.
I feel good about this year.
Villain stuff. It's phrases like that that prove I'm a professional.
Why this sudden exclamation? Life's pretty good right now, honestly. Sure, my godly infant has become a godly toddler, but seeing her still makes me smile. Hex is still awesome to date and it's going really well. I haven't had any major schemes in a while, but I'm going to change that. Can't have Scarab and Sinapse muscling me out of my position as New Vineyard's main villain, after all.
I know just the thing to get me started off. An oldy but a goody, you might say. If you were, you know, incredibly lame.
Time to take the city by storm. Not literally, though. No more weather control for me. At least not right now.
I feel good about this year.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Reader Mail!
Alright, alright. Been busy what with godly toddler and all, been planning some stuff, etc. Sorry I missed that deadline, um, months ago. Anyway, to tide people who still might be reading over, here's some reader mail!
Hey Doc. C
Why'd you change your costume? I thought the old Doctor's look was pretty sharp!
Jake from World's Edge, New York
--Well Jake, I liked it too, but honestly, I thought it was time for an overhaul. You know, get a new look for a new Doctor Cataclysm. Also, the catsuit chafed big time.---
Dr. Doctor Cataclysm
Something's been bugging me. If you're nearly invulnerable, why do you wear armor?
Sincerely, Diane from Athens, Colorado
--For one, it's about brand identity. The old Doc. C wore armor and, well, it just wouldn't feel right without it. Also, given the sheer number of times I've been blown up, I'm kind of glad to have that extra layer of duranium. I may be nigh invulernable, but I'm in no hurry to test that particular power's limits.---
Hey Doc C, you're awesome! Fuck authority! Fuck the system!
Blaze from New Vineyard, Illinois
--I'm going out on a limb here and assuming this is a Candleflames member. Oh well, nice to have a fan. Keep fighting the bad fight, little guy!
Hey, is it true that Lock and Load share everything?
Some horny kid from Basalt Flows, Texas
--Lock and Load have never shared anything, ever, past, present, or future, with anybody. Especially not with each other.---
What are Lock and Load's measurements?
Some other horny kid from Bastion, California
--Impossible without all their implants. Sorry, frustrated teenagers. They're fake. And by "they" I mean like 80% of their bodies.
Well, hope you enjoyed that cop-out. More stuff later. Hopefully that's even true this time!
Hey Doc. C
Why'd you change your costume? I thought the old Doctor's look was pretty sharp!
Jake from World's Edge, New York
--Well Jake, I liked it too, but honestly, I thought it was time for an overhaul. You know, get a new look for a new Doctor Cataclysm. Also, the catsuit chafed big time.---
Dr. Doctor Cataclysm
Something's been bugging me. If you're nearly invulnerable, why do you wear armor?
Sincerely, Diane from Athens, Colorado
--For one, it's about brand identity. The old Doc. C wore armor and, well, it just wouldn't feel right without it. Also, given the sheer number of times I've been blown up, I'm kind of glad to have that extra layer of duranium. I may be nigh invulernable, but I'm in no hurry to test that particular power's limits.---
Hey Doc C, you're awesome! Fuck authority! Fuck the system!
Blaze from New Vineyard, Illinois
--I'm going out on a limb here and assuming this is a Candleflames member. Oh well, nice to have a fan. Keep fighting the bad fight, little guy!
Hey, is it true that Lock and Load share everything?
Some horny kid from Basalt Flows, Texas
--Lock and Load have never shared anything, ever, past, present, or future, with anybody. Especially not with each other.---
What are Lock and Load's measurements?
Some other horny kid from Bastion, California
--Impossible without all their implants. Sorry, frustrated teenagers. They're fake. And by "they" I mean like 80% of their bodies.
Well, hope you enjoyed that cop-out. More stuff later. Hopefully that's even true this time!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)