Ug

So after my pity fest, I'm finally ready to talk about what happened.

I went there to try to stop him. When "Molten Steel" saw me, though, he threw lava at me and yelled, "You stole my son!" Well, it sounded more like "Yu stho my thon!", as said by a volcano, but you get my drift. And then I kinda took off my helmet and said, "I am your son!"

And things kinda devolved from there. Have you ever seen a mile-tall magma monster have a father-son argument before? Well...yeah, okay, if you were watching the news at the time, yeah, you have. But still.

It was wierd, because I just started venting everything that had ever gone wrong in my life and everything Steel had missed for the first time ever. Things like, "Mom killed herself because of you." And "Where were you when Eliza needed someone to take her to the hospital." And "CJ never would have become a druggie if you had been around once in a while."

And then the bastard had the gall to apologize! He was never sorry before! Damnit!

How am I supposed to hate him now that I know he regrets what he did? The worst part is, right after he apologized, he solidified and all life signs faded, so now it seems that the only reason he came back and destroyed a swath of Illinois was to make his peace with me! So, I mean, I guess I still kinda hate him, since he did nothing to try to make peace with CJ or Eliza, but, still. How are you supposed to feel when someone you hate comes back to life just long enough to say, "Sorry I screwed up" to you?

Ergh! This makes me so mad. I'm gonna go knock over a bank. Probably literally. That might make me feel a little better.

....

I don't want to talk about it.

I seriously don't.

Maybe tomorrow. Maybe. Right now I just kinda want to curl up and die.

Okay, Okay

I'm off to try to talk to the Magma Monster down from his rampage. Or at least make sure "Molten Steel" is in too many pieces to come back from the dead this time.

Why is it I can't avoid doing good deeds? Oh, right, because I'm a sucker. More after this is over.

Man.

You people sure know how to take the fun out of my father being a giant magma monster. Yes, I know he's looking for me and yes, he's headed to New Vineyard. But, listen, he's moving at like a mile an hour. He's too heavy and goopy to move any faster. Before he gets anywhere near Lake Michigan, some hero or another will probably be able to find a way to stop him. And if he gets here? He's just going to solidify when he hits the water. Problem solved.

Next I'll get emails that are all, "blah blah blah, the monster's crushing small towns and it's all your fault." Well. Yeah. Okay, now I feel pretty guilty.

God damnit. Now I have to do something about this.

Judy just raised an interesting point, though. I never got the chance to settle things with American Steel. Maybe now I can have that chance. Hmmm.

Alright, I'll stop him. It seems Quizzer, Mississippi Grizzly and the rest are too incompetent anyway. Plus, it's best to get this over with before he starts calling out Eliza's name and Illinois gets ravaged by a psychotic nephilim fighting a mile-high Magma Monster.

What To Do If Your Father Turns Into A Magma Monster

In my case? Absolutely nothing. It's still not my problem. And it's kind of hilarious--former "defender of good" is now a threat to everything he's within several miles of. And he's fighting other superheroes while being said threat.

Maybe I should get some take-out. Popcorn's just not going to cut it with this level of entertainment.

It Never Gets Old

Man, watching this thing slowly move north while batting, kicking, and throwing magma at superheroes never gets old. I've been watching it a couple days now and it is grade A entertainment.

I wonder what it's yelling, though. I don't care what the news says, it's saying something. "Rice Chest?" "Christ Best?"

There's a strong "i" and an "-s" sound. Maybe that hiss beforehand is actuall an "s". It's almost like he's saying....

....oh hell.

He's saying my name. "Silas." I can't believe I didn't realize this before.

That's not just any Magma Monster. That's American Steel. My father.

My Agenda For The Day

1. Make a giant bowl of popcorn.

2. Sit in front of the news.

3. Watch all the heroes in the midwest try to stop the mile-high magma monster.

From The Headlines

"MILE-HIGH MAGMA MONSTER ERUPTS FROM RUINS OF OLD VINEYARD"

I was totally right.